Double-Bagging Plastic - 239
Hal Wastes His Wages
September 11, 2007

See, I care so much about the environment I'm even recycling my columns…

Fact is, I'm about a month into my self-imposed ban on plastic bags and noticing the eco-friendly gesture is certainly not without its challenges.

As mentioned in my August 16 column, a recent Salon.com article by Katharine Mieszkowski highlighted the staggering negative impact everyday plastic bags have on the environment, whether it's the hundreds of thousands of marine animals that become entangled in them each year, or the tree outside your apartment that rustles in the breeze with the sound of non-biodegradable polythene. And despite my normal indignation and overall callousness towards other human beings, I actually give a fraction of a crap about the environment. It stems from the fact that I primarily spend my TV time watching nature programs, and if we keep screwing up the environment there won't be anything good left on TV.

Since then I've pretty much stuck to my guns, with few noticeable exceptions. The hardest part is actually in the preparation. Way back when Lothar of the Hill People began hunting and gathering, he didn't have some pissed-off high school kid with an iPod standing there putting his Mastodon chops in a handy polythene sack for him. It took a bit of forethought to get the goods home, and now I have to practice the same. For the big trips, I normally don my back pack and gear up like a Sherpa about to scale K2. For smaller errands, my good friend Faye gave me a handy cloth grocery bag to haul home my quarry. And should I forget the bag my cargo pants come in handy, though I still can't shake the feeling I'm shoplifting. Keep an eye on the Police Beat to see if I accidentally make an appearance in that section sometime soon.

Another obstacle is trying to explain to the clerk why you don't want a bag. They're robotically programmed to take your goods, bag them and hand you the bag. When you disrupt that process, it creates a disturbance in their flow and they look at you like you're some sort of whacko. Normally it's a brief little dance with awkwardness, but I've actually had to yield more than once to an overzealous clerk who demanded I use his plastic bags. Since I haven't learned the Urdu, Farsi or Korean terms for "environmentally friendly," it's sometimes easier just to take the bag.

But in the end, the undertaking has been worthwhile. One immediate benefit from the initiative is the fact that I've reclaimed an entire kitchen cabinet that was once chock full of plastic shopping bags. The few that do make it into my house I've been using for trash, and once those are exhausted I'm off to Basic Foods for some organic garbage bags. That's right--I'm going all in on this hippie thing.

It's do-able, Hudson County, we can wean ourselves off plastic bags and make a tangible step forward in the universally imperative effort to protect our environment. 

Small business owners, consider the potential benefits of proactively seeking alternatives to plastic bags. Large corporate chains feeding off the area's commerce, it would be a decent gesture to show you actually care about the local environment. Opportunistic politicians, consider the legacy. And trendy yuppie scum, this should be right in your wheelhouse.

Christopher M Halleron owns and retains all proprietary rights to the Site and the content provided by the Site. The Site contains material, including links and compilations of individual data, trademarks, and other proprietary information of chrishalleron.com.  Except for that information which is in the public domain or for which you have been given written permission to use, you may not copy, modify, publish, transmit, distribute, perform, display, or sell any such proprietary information.  Any questions or comments, please contact Chris Halleron at chris@chrishalleron.com.